So this past week has definitely was a bumpy one. I am not sure why but I just felt a little bit down almost like something was missing in my life. Then I go to read this from President Thomas S. Monson regarding the anniversary of 9/11. That was what was missing...a more firm belief in my Savior, it reminded me of the Hymn " More Holiness Give Me"

More holiness give me,
More strivings within,
More patience in suff’ring,
More sorrow for sin,
More faith in my Savior,
More sense of his care,
More joy in his service,
More purpose in prayer.

I really now have a renewed desire to come to know my Savior and to have more meaningful prayer.

"There was, as many have noted, a remarkable surge of faith following the tragedy. People across the United States rediscovered the need for God and turned to Him for solace and understanding. Comfortable times were shattered. We felt the great unsteadiness of life and reached for the great steadiness of our Father in Heaven. And, as ever, we found it. Americans of all faiths came together in a remarkable way.
Sadly, it seems that much of that renewal of faith has waned in the years that have followed. Healing has come with time, but so has indifference. We forget how vulnerable and sorrowful we felt. Our sorrow moved us to remember the deep purposes of our lives. The darkness of our despair brought us a moment of enlightenment. But we are forgetful. When the depth of grief has passed, its lessons often pass from our minds and hearts as well.
Our Father’s commitment to us, His children, is unwavering. Indeed He softens the winters of our lives, but He also brightens our summers. Whether it is the best of times or the worst, He is with us. He has promised us that this will never change.
But we are less faithful than He is. By nature we are vain, frail, and foolish. We sometimes neglect God. Sometimes we fail to keep the commandments that He gives us to make us happy. Sometimes we fail to commune with Him in prayer. Sometimes we forget to succor the poor and the downtrodden who are also His children. And our forgetfulness is very much to our detriment.
If there is a spiritual lesson to be learned from our experience of that fateful day, it may be that we owe to God the same faithfulness that He gives to us. We should strive for steadiness, and for a commitment to God that does not ebb and flow with the years or the crises of our lives. It should not require tragedy for us to remember Him, and we should not be compelled to humility before giving Him our faith and trust. We too should be with Him in every season.
The way to be with God in every season is to strive to be near Him every week and each day. We truly “need Him every hour,” not just in hours of devastation. We must speak to Him, listen to Him, and serve Him. If we wish to serve Him, we should serve our fellow men. We will mourn the lives we lose, but we should also fix the lives that can be mended and heal the hearts that may yet be healed.
It is constancy that God would have from us. Tragedies are not merely opportunities to give Him a fleeting thought, or for momentary insight to His plan for our happiness. Destruction allows us to rebuild our lives in the way He teaches us, and to become something different than we were. We can make Him the center of our thoughts and His Son, Jesus Christ, the pattern for our behavior. We may not only find faith in God in our sorrow. We may also become faithful to Him in times of calm."

President Thomas S. Monson, President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints

faith that is still growing

So you might think "oh she is a missionary, she has so much faith" What missionary doesn't in fact what member of the church doesn't? Well I am definitely learning that in this life we are learning to walk by faith. Yes it is hard and sometimes I even think to myself " Is this really worth all of the hard work that I put forth?" And every single time I ask myself this question the answer is always YES. I was actually reading in Ether 2 and 3 in the Book of Mormon, about a man and his faith. How he asks God to help him with his problem-go read it!

Well I  was definitely humbled this morning and realized that i am not fully relying upon the Lord for the things that he wants me to do. But I am here to stand before you today things like this happen, because we need to know what we need to change and improve upon in our lives. It reminds me of the story of Moses in the Pearl of Great Price Moses 1--God humbles Moses but at the same time ennobles, strengthens him,  God gives him confidence and power. This is the way the Lord works and yes it is hard but is is worth it. Keep it up look forward with faith with a perfect brightness of hope and a love for all men. 2 Nephi 31:20